One of the key causes of human misery is our need and expectation of external validation in every type of relationship that we involve ourselves in, even with unknown strangers.

We draw energy, comfort, perhaps a little dopamine hit from these validations. Do you say you don’t? Just think about your emotional response to the last “like” you received on LinkedIn or FaceBook.

One could be driven by our own internal validation of who we are and what we want to be or work to be. And then there is the ultimate state. Not requiring any validation at all - both external and internal. Nirvana. Peace. Living in acceptance. Living in the moment and the now. Living with no expectation. Easier said than done and might work for some outliers who practice this lifelong. It’s a journey. And one keeps trying… and working on it. One day at a time.

Here is the stoic quote that triggered all this thinking today:

“When someone is properly grounded in life, they shouldn't have to look outside themselves for approval.”

— Epictetus

And yet, we do…