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He's a keeper!
Daily musings #632- Monday, 5 December 2022
I try to make coffee three times a day for myself and when I do that I also make it and serve my spouse who is often busy at work. Well, this is one of the simple pleasures of life and I try to keep my relationship alive with every possible touch point to promote it. I do make breakfast most days and my wife ups her commitments by filling my tummy at lunch and dinner. And, no. There is no keeping of accounts in this. No tit for tat. And her meal-making effort far exceeds the little I do for her.
But this article is not about these accounting transactions. Recently, she was on camera with a group of work folks when I served her coffee in her home office. And someone blurted “He’s a keeper”. This is more around that shout-out. It showed how culturally insecure the North American society might be. For those who are married with some form of “Death do us part” ceremony, this should not even be a thought. One does not need to decide to keep someone. They just do. Because there is no intention otherwise. After more than thirty years with my spouse, these are thoughts that don’t even go around in my mind. And I can certainly say that I believe that my wife feels that way too.
If one doesn’t believe in the constitution of a legal wedlock and is in a long-term monogamous relationship of any sort, then the reevaluation of whether to continue to stay (keep) in a relationship is baked in due to the existence of the relationship itself.
Therefore, unless someone is not in an existing relationship, it occurred to me that “one’s a keeper” is more of a redundant irrelevant comment. Or is my perspective influenced by and stemming from my cultural programming biases and where my life evolved from?