I am still in week two of my recovery. Energy, strength, moods, and feelings ebb and flow every hour. After all these years, I sort of understand myself, I think. I guess that I am some sort of cognitive artist. And I would love to going back to practicing my art.
For years, perhaps decades, I wasn’t an artist. I wasn’t even anything initially. I remember finding computers in the early ’80s and learned a lot outside of what I learned in school. All those things in school weren’t of much help but at that time.
Slowly my life formed and along the way I acquired a multitude of patterns - patterns in software development, patterns in applying software to solve business problems, various large projects, and programs, a multitude of tools and technologies, patterns of culture, patterns of ways of work, and recently my learnings were back to reinforce what I had learned in school - the basics of biology, physics, history, business, philosophy and connecting them to make meaning and art.
The recent house arrest is hard because I am cannot apply any art to myself and my recovery process. I can’t even create crafty answers because I am expected to do the hard work with my human body’s recovery process. The mundane and the repetitive as I build my strength and heal.
Sleep, eat, take medicines, stretch, walk, shower, sit, nap, stretch, walk, sit, eat, stretch, walk, eat, medicines, and so on… the glorious repetitive mundane as things slowly heal in my body. My autonomic human machine is busy fighting its battles to heal the wounds and put me back on a road to recovery. It is doing most of the heavy lifting for me. And for my part, I just have to follow the science and help my body get along the way.
I am sure the craft and art will come back soon. Until then, creating these blog posts each day (art) and the process of writing it (craft) is the tiny bit of salvation to the monotonously boring mundane science of recovery that I am stuck in.