Quiet and the focus
Daily musings #628- Sunday, 27 November 2022
I realize that I have a cluttered mind. With my thoughts whizzing away every instant in different directions. That is one of the things that stop me from focusing. And it might be something to do with the way my brain is designed and wired to work. And as I grow older I see that the unfocus is increasing by the day. And after serious introspection, I think that the problem is external stimuli. Especially sound in my ears.
A few weeks back I attended a D&I event at work which showcased people with different kinds of varied patterns (I am trying to not define them as disabilities or ailments - though some could be - and therefore more a deviation from what we call “norms”) and a couple of interesting people spoke about how they cope. One of them uses a noise-canceling headset (Bose Quietcomfort - which I do have a couple of them lying around) all during the work day while working. And another of them who uses multiples of similar devices all day long - yes 24 hours a day (including while sleeping which might be most uncomfortable)
Yesterday this was reinforced in another Korean series that I started watching on Netflix. The story of an autistic lawyer Woo Young-Woo in Extraordinary Attorney Woo who uses similar devices to navigate her day and the anxieties that it causes her.
The lack of quiet in my ears impacts every aspect of things I do during the day. Only a very few things that I totally enjoy doing can be got away with, without any impact. These things that I love doing for some reason motivate me to overcome my limitations. Also, this impact of the little sounds in my head also impacts me during sleeping and I do have a series of experiments there… some working and some not so much. The sound of the AC running. The click from the fan. The little noises from the furnace two floors down. They all impact me…
So I start yet another day-time experiment. I am gathering all my noise-canceling devices lying around. I happen to have quite a few lying around. The noise-canceling Airpod Pro that I am using right now to bang out this article in ten minutes. A couple of Bose QC headsets (which have not been charged in months) and a couple of old wired Bose noise-canceling earphones - bought in the times before when they could figure out how to make these actually wireless. It is not for lack of devices.
The experiment is itself about motivation. Motivation to do the things that I want to do but am unable to get myself to do. And the initial motivation of putting on a noise-canceling device first and switching it on, one that automatically gets me to start doing things - anything that I really want to do. Anytime I want to do it.
So starts another experiment… by musing about my musings.